Real Life Porn Couples Advice For Couples After Valentine’s Day
For the average couple looking to keep the flames burning in their relationship year round takes work, not to mention patience and dedication. ‘Reel life’ porn couples do it every day on camera, and off. For them it’s also a job, but they seem to have a lot more fun doing it than the typical civilian. Why is that?
I have friends who date in the adult industry (performers and non) and they challenge the status quo as it pertains to the rules of relationships. I am awestruck at how no one ever seems jealous of his or her partners other partner’s, and how these couples always manage to make time for each other when they get home.
Seems impossible, I know. Especially when you have sex for a living, or your counterpart does. But guess what? It’s not hard to keep the romance alive, regardless of what you do, or how long you’ve been together, if you just make the effort. I happen to know six unique and unconventional couples that are living proof of this concept.
To celebrate them, I put together a big Valentines Day special for Vivid Radio, where I do my show twice a week, The Single Life. This aural extravaganza can be heard exclusively on SiriusXM 791, and is currently available for download on the Vivid Radio website.
The folks below were all guests on my show. Some were in studio, and the others called in together to share their stories or dispense some wisdom for the holiday. I figured whom better to give you advice on ways to spice up your sex life than these 13 connoisseurs of coitus.
Nicole Aniston and Chad White
Nicole Aniston, adult star and Penthouse Pet of the Year 2013, and her boyfriend Chad White, the man with the most perfect penis in the biz, are considered one of porn’s top ‘power couples’. They’ve been together over 2 years, and live down the street from each other. When they first met Nicole was strictly doing G/G scenes, but Chad put the bug in her ear to start shooting B/G again. They’ve worked together quite a bit for Naughty America and they shoot a lot of content with each other for their respective websites, which is convenient since they are neighbors.
Nicole: I perform with other talent as well. And the same goes for Chad; he obviously performs with other females. But there are no real restrictions as far as the workplace goes because the job has taken care of me longer than he has. And the same goes for him. If any other job were present in our relationship I would never ask him to leave, you know… banking, or real estate? And vice versa.
As far as rules go, we don’t really have them. Off camera is different. We do have restrictions as far as off-camera behavior. He knows I’m kind of black and white with my career as well, I think most pretty savvy female talents are. When the camera stops rolling we’re really cut and dry. We’re there to create a fantasy and do a job. I’m not there to ‘get laid’ most of the time, I’m there to put on a really good fantasy for the fans and viewers. And his job is harder than mine sometimes when he has to do 3 scenes a day.
Chad’s and my relationship revolves around humor. We are very light hearted, there’s very little we take seriously. We try to plan everything around work, because work does come first. Very rarely do we take days off to do anything special or anything like that. So if we both have the day off on Valentines Day we’ll probably do some kind of a yummy dinner, and he’ll fight me as being Vegan (laughs). And we’ll probably shoot content, definitely. I think we’re actually planning to do a Periscope dinner with fans on Valentines Day, too.
Chad: There are different ways couples can spice up their sex lives depending on their comfort level. You can bring someone into the bedroom with you – that’s one way. If you want to incorporate videos, toys, different types of lubes, different positions. Go fuck in the laundry room. Go fuck on the kitchen counter. Go fuck in random bedrooms. Outside. There’s always some way to spice it up.
Nicole: It’s learning what you like, too. I know that a lot of couples get bored because they don’t know what the other one likes, and they do the same thing every single day because they think it’s what has worked for the last 10 years. And that gets really boring. Chad and I get a lot of couples that come to us that are very new to porn looking for advice. I tell them read some books, read some magazine articles. If you want to get crazy, go on Twitter. I’m very vocal with my fans.
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Natasha Starr and Sidney Coca and Rebel Lynn
Meet my favorite three-way couple! Adult star and Penthouse Pet for August 2013, Natasha Starr, and her longtime boyfriend, XXX talent manager and publicist, Sidney Coca, have been in an open relationship for the last 6 years. They met through mutual friends at a Swingers party in NYC before either of them was in the adult industry. It was Natasha who wanted to pursue being a porn star, and Sidney supported her career choice. They are currently in a Polyamorous triad relationship with porn newcomer Rebel Lynn for the last 10 months. They all live together.
Natasha: Why is it only on one day that you’re expected to be romantic? What about the whole rest of the year? It’s not one day that you do ‘this and that’. How about every day you do something different?
I think it should go both ways on Valentines Day. A girl should have a surprise for a guy; a guy should have a surprise for the girl. It should be 50/50.
Sidney: If you go all out year one, it’s like you’re trying to prove something more. My advice for new couples dating less than a year is to go out for a nice, special romantic date. But take care of your woman, buy her flowers, candy, whatever it is that she likes. Make it romantic for her, rose petals, something at the house, candles. Just don’t set the house on fire (laughs). We did that!
Natasha: We had a bad experience with candles (laughs), so no candles for us. Just the fake ones! I’d be happy with 12 cocks for Valentines Day – A bouquet! Fuck flowers!
Rebel: Some advice for couples going through a rough patch on Valentines Day… I think if you’re a couple going through a rough spot it’s a day you guys should sit down and talk. And work things out between each other. Obviously something’s going on. You need to take that time to flip it around.
Natasha: As we went from the beginning of our relationship with Rebel, the rules have changed. Every time we have ‘play’ the same day with her, the rules change. Every day it’s something different.
Sidney: We weren’t looking for a girlfriend. So it’s not like we had the ‘1-10 List’ these are going to be our rules. They just kind of happened. So we talk about it along the way. What are we comfortable with, what are we not comfortable with? We are very comfortable at this point.
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September Reign and Alec Knight
Porn ingénue September Reign and veteran adult star Alec Knight made their relationship official October last year. Alec is September’s Master and they live together in a committed Dom/Sub relationship, even though they both fuck other people on camera, and off. She is submissive to Alec at home, and also on film. Neither was looking for a relationship initially, but hanging out in the lifestyle they realized they had a cool vibe together. September approached Alec to ‘Dom’ her because he’s super sweet in his every day life, but he can be animalistic in the bedroom.
September: If you do romance randomly, it’s a little bit better. I feel like if you wait for Christmas or Valentines Day to show you care then it’s kind of generic. But if you just come in the house and it’s hot and ready… it’s like, “Okay!”
This is our first Valentines Day. We’re still newish even though we’re very comfortable with each other, and we live together. This is my first year in the industry. To go from Christmas to XBIZ to AVN to now, you barely get enough time to take a moment. Now comes Valentines Day and things can get stressful. You’re trying to work. He’s trying to work.
Alec: We’ll make the time, and we’ll and have our days together. We both work really hard, but in the next couple of days we’ll have ‘our day’. You can spice things up, like Chad said. September and I find the time, we make it.
September: If you find someone you really connect with you’re automatically going to have a great sex life. And that’s regardless of whether you’re 2 people, 3 people, 4 people, whatever. But in between those times you do have to say, “Okay, I have some time, he has some free time – let me put on an outfit”.
I like the fact that we’re all in this ‘community’, whether you do adult films, or you dance, we have a more open mind and we can see more so than a “Vanilla” person would be able to see. So when you’re going through that rough patch, we constantly have to go through that. Because of what we do, that’s a conversation we have weekly, not just on Valentines Day.
We didn’t have a plan. When you don’t have a plan, and you go with the flow, and you have to learn new things, or when you want to implement something new, you’re going to have to have a new conversation, and tweak some stuff, and move some things around. But, it makes it so cool, because you find out so much shit about yourself.
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DJ Darcie Dolce and Marc Mojo
DJ, adult star, and Penthouse magazine’s newest Pet for Feb. 2016, Darcie Dolce, and talent agent for The VIP Connect, Marc Mojo, have been together for 3 years. Busy launching Dolce XXX in April, Darcie also recently directed a movie for Filly Films, The Lesbian Landlord, out in May. They’ll be celebrating this Valentines Day in the most romantic way – by getting married in Hawaii! (Mazel Tov, guys!)
Darcie: We met up in Sacramento, cause I’m from there, and Marc had a magazine called, NORCAL, at the time. I’m 23, I was 19 when we met on Model Mayhem, he wanted to do a photo shoot with me and I went and did it. And I had a boyfriend at the time, and there was something about Marc I really liked. I was really drawn to him. He had really good energy. And I called him about a month later and was like, “I like you, let’s hang out!” That’s literally how it happened, and we’ve been together ever since.
Marc: I think for her, she saw something she liked, and she was very persistent. The thing I liked was that she called several times in a row, and I was like, “No, I’m busy, no, I’m busy, no, I’m busy”, and she didn’t take a hint. After about the fifth, sixth, seventh time of calling, she was like, “Pack up your shit, and get your fucking ass over here”. And I was like, “Whoa”! After about 7 calls and me putting her off, she put her foot down she was like, “No, fuck that, pack up your laptop and get your ass over here”. And we’ve been together since.
Darcie: I think the key to our success, as a couple, is we support each other.
Marc: Success creates success. If you have a success driven relationship, you’ll be successful in your relationship.
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Alexandra Silk and Luc Wylder
This veteran porn couple has withstood the test of time. After 20 years together, porn star/director/producer/and certified surrogate partner therapist, Alexandra Silk (‘Silky’ to her friends), and her husband, director/producer/psychologist/trained sex surrogate, Luc Wylder, are still going strong. They are true examples for any couple in any industry. Originally meeting through friends, they became friends for two years before dating. Not only do this couple live and play together; they also work together, as the co-owners of Fallen Angel TV.
Alexandra: Orgasms are the secret to our success!
Luc: A lot of physical contact is important. But also, we have this really open, honest relationship where we’re free and comfortable sharing almost anything.
Alexandra: We work and live together, and it takes a lot of respect. Even when we’re working together, we work with respect for one another. We rarely fight. I think a lot of it comes from being honest and truthful and communicative – those four things.
Luc: Regarding the issue of jealousy in relationships, I don’t feel it’s about control. It’s about your own self-confidence, and your trust in your partner. So there’s really no reason for either of us to be jealous in our relationship. It just doesn’t arise. We are considerate of each other. We’re confident in our own selves, and in our abilities, and our ability to maintain our independence separate from the relationship. Jealousy is something we’ve never had to go through.
We both just graduated yesterday with our degrees in Human Sexuality from the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality in San Francisco, so this is going to be a week of party, party, party! We’ll be in San Francisco for Valentines Day. So, you know that old song, “I left my heart in San Francisco”. That’s one thing we always do. We have driven across the country multiple times. We love these long road trips. Silky is always so naughty when we drive around.
Alexandra: Yeah. I always wear a skirt (laughs).
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Savana Styles and Lexington Steele
French Canadian adult star Savana Styles and the hardest workingman in porn, the legendary Lexington Steele met one year ago at the AVN Awards in Las Vegas. Savana’s got one of the greatest Asses – and accents – in the biz, so it’s no surprise that she grabbed the attention of porn’s hottest male star.
Savana: I was there at the AVN as a fan. When I met him, I was a fan of his. I was there just for an autograph, and to talk to him. I was so surprised when he gave me his number, and invited me after to his place. We fell in love, and now we’re together.
Lex: I like women that are Amazon-like, you know, tall, athletic, and she was physically the type of woman I am always most attracted to. But it was her independence, and who she is as a person, that has kept me. Because physicality is something we can get anywhere. The whole package, you can’t find that too often.
Savana: The best advice for Valentines Day, and to spice up your sex life is to be open-minded in your sexuality. We do a lot of things sexual with other people, we watch porn movies together, and we have a lot of toys. We try many different things to keep our spirit open. I think it works.
Lex: In terms of Valentines, we’ll probably wait until the night before to decide what we’re doing.
Savana: Yeah. We’re really spontaneous!
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