The Underground — Issue #103
Everything you need to know about in this weekly series: Nick Offerman rings in the New Year with some choice scotch, see how far humanity has reached into space, know how to plan a party so you don’t waste too much money on leftovers, and the hot coffee from McDonald’s lawsuit is proved to be as horrific as you thought.
At Social Underground we go beyond the mainstream stuff and see what’s underneath the surface. What should we get into, listen to, read, eat or watch? If there is something in our culture that needs attention that’s our job: Show you the underground things that you need to know about: Books, music, television, movies, comedians, art, and whatever else we can find to get you into something you never knew about. That’s The Underground.
1. Nick Offerman and Lagavulin give you the best way to celebrate New Years Eve. Nick Offerman is up there as one of the wisest men in all of the entertainment business. Everything he says is either hilarious or a life tip. His books are something you should put out in public for people to browse. You can literally pick up one of them, open to any page, then start reading. If you know who he is, you will hear his voice when you read his words. It’s hard not to smile the entire time when you know that.
Last year, Offerman headed to the Laguvulin plant in Scotland. They make the best Scotch on the planet. Instead of wasting your time doing shots of garbage liquor, why not have a seat, pour a glass of single malt Scotch from Lagavulin, and sit by a fire watching the ball drop on New Years Eve. Nick Offerman hangs out below showing you that chilling while others are celebrating is totally okay. He also makes me want to grow a mustache, but genetics are awful. Pour me more Laguvulin.
2. Check out how far our technology has reached into the vastness of space. It’s really understated how difficult it is to travel in space. It take around 4 days to reach the Moon, but we can see it every night we look up to the sky. When it’s nighttime, you can look up and see the stars, but they’re light years away. The distance is scary when you take a bit to think about it. By the time the light hits here, there could’ve been dramatic things happening in the time it took the light to come here.
The scenario of time brings me back to out exploration of our local system. We haven’t really gone that far, but some of our tech has been traveling for decades. Voyager 1 has been out there since 1977. It’s lonely when you think about a probe out there alone. Let’s man-up and look at where our tech has brought us. Below is an infographic that with show you just how far humanity has traveled. Maybe if we invest more money into exploration we could go further. To infinity and beyond!
3. How to serve at your party so you don’t waste food. No matter what holiday it is, you have leftovers. If you have ever hosted a party with food, it will come with foot left uneaten. It’s great if you’re the host, but it sucks if you’re the host. When you host a party, you have to set your entire house up, but you also have to drop a bunch of money on food and drinks. You know people will bring stuff, but you have to prepare everything in case your guest are awful and don’t bring anything they’re supposed to. The guy bringing the green bean casserole almost always ruins it.
Below is a guide for hosting a party. My own guide? Wait until the guests are drunk. Serve the food a few hours into people being drink, then the food will be destroyed without napkins. You know that it works that way.
4. The McDonald’s lawsuit was correct and terrifying. Stop and think about lawsuits that go against fast food places. Don’t they sound like they’re shaming people because they were to a fast food place? What about if you pulled into a place, bought coffee, then spilled 190 degree coffee on your lap? Fast food means it’s ready to consume in your car. If what you buy is not ready to consume because it’s scalding, there’s a problem. A 79-year-old woman getting burned is something everyone should show sympathy toward. The more you read about this will piss you off.
When you hear people complain about fast food, remember that it’s their choice to go there. McDonald’s is a place that serves fast food into your car. Remember that an underpaid worker is handing you hot liquid into your car. Safe or not, it could spill on to your lap. As much as all the fast food places say they changed their policies, always remember that your skin burns.
Follow Jeff Sorensen on TWITTER
Jeff Sorensen is an author, writer and occasional comedian living in Detroit, Michigan. You can look for more of his work on The Huffington Post,UPROXX,BGR and by just looking up his name.